i’m kind of trying to write a story that focuses on adolescent female friendship and had an interesting revelation whilst writing that seems relevant to stuff on my dash.
my adolescent experience was basically full of female friendship and i just think its interesting that up to a certain point, girls were the recipients of all physical and emotional connection from me. And yeah, even some of the physical stuff was probably a little sexual, because we were all just figuring stuff out. I don’t remember it feeling sexual — I don’t think I had the ability or knowledge to frame it in that way.
But then - in retrospect it seems abrupt but in reality it was probably really gradual - i started seeking connection and physical affection from boys. And I shut down physical contact with my girl friends. And all the sudden stuff that I thought was just “playing” turned into sin and sex and…
wow. holy cow am i glad to be done with puberty. Why the hell would I want to write a story and revisit all that?